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The blog post below was written by Verity, a 24 year old wishing to share her story of recovery. She hopes you enjoy reading it, maybe it will inspire you to start your journey?
People wont believe me, they'll think I'm lying, I'm just an attention seeker.... Sound familiar? Read on....
I'm Verity, I'm 24 and this is MY story of self harm.
I know how it is, its the first thing you think of when you wake up, the thought of it is what keeps you going throughout the day. You need to relax, you need relief. You want nothing more than the sun to start setting so you can close your curtains, light a candle and begin.....
Do you wear a long sleeve top even though you know your going to get hot and sweaty. Or do you wear a short sleeve top and try your hardest to ignore those red lines, to ignore people looking at them.
I'm not writing this to tell you that self harming is wrong or that you need to stop doing it. I am simply writing this to tell you; I know how it is, I've been there and I wish to share my story of recovery.
I know first hand how frustrating it is when someone sits in front of you and says... 'Go for a walk' …. 'Take a bath' ….. 'Read a book'. You look at the floor and nod your head, tears streaming down your face. Your trying to hold back your anger when all you want to do is stand up, scream and punch a hole through the wall so you can run away. Again, sound familiar? Please keep reading!
Now, hear me out, recovery is not an overnight diary entry. It is a long process, a stop-start journey, a one step forward-two steps back hike.
It is a gradual process with many twists and turns, ups and downs.
That's okay. It okay to get better then worse again. Its okay to stop and then start again. Its okay, I know how it is.
You've got this far so you may as well keep reading....
How about starting off with lifestyle changes and to make that sound less scary, all I mean is, small routine adjustments;
Use your free time to work on one (or however many!) of the following;
Take care of yourself
Try to do one of the following atleast twice a week;
Take time for you
Find something YOU love doing and make time to do it each week. Here are just a few ideas;
You still with me? Good! Last little bit....
Now, I am well aware that these may not help everyone but I wanted to write this. For me. For YOU.
So go on, give it a go, give it a chance and see what happens. Start your recovery journey, you'll learn what works for you and what doesn't. That's the beauty of journeys. And who knows, maybe one day, it'll be you who is sat in bed, typing about YOUR story of self harm.
I know how it is.