Living with dark thoughts is like living with any invisible illness; no one knows what’s going on in your head.
You are wearing a mask and no one can see what is going on behind that; maybe you don’t take the mask off because you fear what people will think of you if you did; maybe you don’t take the mask off because you are fearful of what you will find; maybe you keep the mask on because it feels easier at the moment.
Feeling low and out of balance in yourself is the same as if you had a bad pain in your arm: you wouldn’t leave it too long before getting it checked out. We all have bad days that sometimes-become bad weeks- when the week becomes a fortnight and sleep becomes effected it’s time to get checked out.
In the same way a broken arm doesn’t heal without help; your low mood may not heal with some help. Sometimes some exercise, relaxation techniques and talking can help; sometimes you may need a little more than that.
Going to a GP can feel really threatening, if you are over 16 you can go on your own. Maybe write down how you are feeling because saying it can feel really tough.
Self-harm may be happening because your mask wearing days are causing you anxiety; fear; pain and making you feel at odds with yourself. Self-harm maybe happening because you are angry at yourself for not coping how you feel you should; self-harm may be happening because something horrid has happened to you.
Again, think of it as feeling ill, uneasy with yourself – get yourself checked out. If you don’t feel like making the step to the GP, how about a trusted teacher, a friend, an adult, a family member. Self-harm doesn’t define you; self-harm isn’t going to be your way forever. It is for a short time while you work out a better way.
At SelfharmUK, we know how unwell you must be feeling to be harming yourself, we know it isn’t the choice of someone happy in life. We know we can journey with you through some of your questions and difficulties to help you take off your mask.